So here I am again.

So here I am again. This term in school I started my education classes. I am having a hard time completing them. Up until now school this way has been wonderful for me. Self paced has been such a blessing. I can work on it when I have time. Then when I realize I am in a crunch I catch up. Not a big deal really. I haven't been accelerating my classes. I could have. I could easily have done probably 2 classes per month if I really focused. I have been moving at a comfortable pace with little to no pressure.

Until this term. This term if I finish these classes I am pretty much locked in to this major or the classes will be wasted. This isn't the first time I have been here. I have officially changed my major 8 times. In my head I have changed it at least 8 more. Each and every single time I get close to being done I either quit or change majors. I have even been known to take drastic steps like joining the military to keep from finishing.  I always go back though. I have enough classes under my belt to have a degree in ...well, in taking classes.

But every time I get close to finishing I panic. I think what if this is the wrong choice? What if I really want to do x instead of z? And then I just can't seem to finish.  I am at the same place again. So what is in my future? Is it college major number 9? No. I am not going to change. I am going to muddle through this time. I am not going switch. I may never use it. That is fine. I have decided that it is okay. I may eventually decide to do something else but even if I do I am finishing this.

I think I can. I think I can. I think I can.

Shell