Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Day 21 of 30 Days of Thankfulness (Abundance)

A couple of days ago I did our budget for April. I had to refigure everything because of the recent increase in gas prices. I know the increase is hurting everyone but for those of us who commute it is killer.  Doing that budget just almost made me ill.  It also made me really grateful we have been slowly paying off and eliminating any debt we have (thank you Dave Ramsey but I guess that is a whole different blog post).  I was feeling pretty lousy and thinking about how little money we have. I am missing those Real Estate commission checks right about now I can tell you that.  I stand by my decision to quit but ever so often I wonder if I should have made a different choice.

So anyway as I said I was feeling bad trying to decide if we were going to make it financially until I finish school.  Thinking about choices I made in the past and how I wish I hadn't waited this long to finish.  That oh poor me what are we going to do feeling carried over into the next day and I woke up yesterday feeling pretty much the same.  I was back to maybe I need to get a full time job with regular pay vs. commission and put off school. Then thinking if I keep putting it off nothing is ever going to change. I keep telling myself it will be worth it in the long run but I hate not having any money (insert whining oh poor me voice).  Then my friend Kim called me and wanted to meet for coffee. While we where there we were talking to the pastor of a local church and he was telling us about a new program they were trying to start at their church.  He said that he felt he needed to take action when the church he pastors found out there was a local family living in a storage unit.  Then he was talking to someone at his kid's school and they were saying that many of the kids come to school Monday morning hungry. They are on free lunch at school but they don't have food to eat over the weekends.

Wow can you say wake up call.  There is probably enough food in my fridge that I will toss out when I clean it out tomorrow to feed a family of 4 for a week.  My pantry is stuffed.  My idea of being broke is worrying about how I am going to pay my cell phone bill for our three cell phones complete with texting packages.  As I sit here typing on my laptop (which is one of two computers in our house) while watching music videos on my expanded digital cable package with high speed internet you tell me .... just how broke am I really?  Do I need to make some changes if we are going to make it through the next year while I go to school? Absolutely!  Are those changes any where near as difficult as figuring out where my family is going to sleep tonight or where I will get food for them to eat? No they aren't.  So even though I may feel we don't have enough money I am very thankful today for what is actually an abundance.


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